Air Traffic Control to Olivia

I will take most of the blame and say that I am usually the reason our family is late to nearly everything. BUT, my darling daughter does appear to be following in my foot steps. Every. Single. Morning. I am directing her to eat breakfast, get dressed, stop getting out books, brush her teeth, put on her coat, get in the car, no REALLY GET. IN. THE. CAR. No, we cannot ride bikes. Yes, you have to go to school. No, you cannot sit in the driver's seat of the car. Yes, you can bring your doll, books, whatever, but not into school. Put your shoes back on your feet. No, the other foot. Crap, yes, I forgot your lunch!

Does anyone else feel like air traffic control trying to get their kid to just get out the friggin' door??

Now, I don't normally classify myself as an optimist but I really must be because every single morning, before Oli gets up, I think "Today is going to go so much more smoothly. Today I will be on time to work." And every single morning, I am running around this house trying to just get us in the car and thinking "Well, 15 minutes late isn't *that* bad..."

It's not even that our mornings are bad really. Usually we are laughing and talking and enjoying each other's company but I DREAD that moment when I say "Okay, time to get dressed!" In that moment, Lady Loco comes out in full force and off she goes, trying to outrun me through the house. OH, and is anyone else shocked that their child has the speed of an Olympian and the strength of 10 men when they don't want to do something? I mean, I just grasp for anything as she streaks by me and wonder "How the heck did she manage to completely undress herself...AGAIN?!?!?"

The wrestling match to get her socks and shoes on is WWE worthy and there are crocodile keepers who make sticking their heads in a crock's mouth look like child's play compared to me trying to brush Olivia's teeth.

Every 30 seconds I am saying things like "You are about to lose your stickers!" or "No jelly beans this morning!" or "No, you don't need to go poop AGAIN. I know you are just stalling."

And y'all, this is all BEFORE 8:30 A.M.!!!! By the time I get to work, I feel like I've already worked one full time job. It's insanity.

I dread the day when we actually have to be on time somewhere. When that day comes, be on the lookout for a little girl with no pants on and her teeth not brushed with her mom who forgot to take her hair out of hot rollers before they left the house, cause that'll be us, folks.