There’s a new craze in the Facebook world where people are
posting a certain number of random facts about themselves. And if you ‘like’ or
comment on their post, they’ll give you a number, and you have to come up with
that many random facts about yourself. I’m not much for the Facebook crazes but
I actually think this one is kind of fun. I’m going to do it a little
differently though. I received the number 11 from my good friend, Brandie, and
I’m happy to share 11 things about myself. But I’m going to do it here on this
trusty blog and share one a day for 11 days. And they’ll be random
things about myself specifically relating to motherhood. Let’s call it 11
Confessions from a Really Really Real Mom. Here we go:
Number 4: I feel like a Mommy Rock Star about some of the
goofiest crap. I’m a pretty analytical and logical person. Or, you know, some
of the time anyway. And before I had a kid, I never could understand when
people got excited about really mundane crap that their kid did. For instance,
I’d hear a mom say (or see a post on Facebook) something like “Oh my goodness! My
daughter, Blue Ivey Apple Kingston, just put her shoes on for the first time BY
HERSELF!!!” And I would think to myself “Well whoo-dee-hoo, lady. Pretty much
every human I know can put their shoes on by themselves.”
Lately though, I realize I feel this urge to tell the world
(via Facebook of course, cause how else do we share mundane crap these days?) the
truly simple things that my kid does. Logically, I know they are simple things
but to me they seem just MONUMENTAL and I feel like everyone who is my “friend”
on the internet should know about it.
Case in point: tonight we had fish for dinner. Normally, Olivia
eats what we eat and we refuse to make a different meal for her. There are some
exceptions though and, until tonight, fish was one of them. But tonight I
decided that if she’s never forced to eat it or at least try it, she probably
never will eat it. So I put a few pieces on her plate and told
her she could not have Cheetos, she could have fish. I also made a deal with
her that if she absolutely hated it, she could spit it out. She took her first
bite and told me through a mouth of fish that she hated it. I told her to
finish chewing before she made her final decision. She did and then pronounced
that she did not like it and she wanted chicken nuggets. I said “no” and braced
for the storm. But no storm came. She ate her broccoli and some rice and then
took another bite of fish—unprompted! The next words out of her mouth were “Mmmmmmm…tasty!”
And she finished her plate.
And that very simple, boring dinner interaction, ladies and
gentlemen, made me feel like a mother freaking ROCK STAR. I mean, I was
mentally high fiving myself and thinking “Man, I have GOT to tell everyone
about this! I can’t believe my daughter just ate fish and liked it! That was
amazing! I mean, I know there’s breaking news all over the world right now but
this, THIS moment is just too good to NOT share!” I started to get my phone to
type up a little Facebook post about this truly groundbreaking news so all of my 276
dearest friends would know that my child had fish for dinner.
And then I realized how probably no one else in the whole
world probably gives a rat’s behind that my daughter ate some friggin’ fish for
dinner. But see, this is what mommyhood does to you. It makes all of these
used-to-be insignificant moments, really freaking significant all of a sudden.
And even though I know that, I still kind of think that the
fact that my kid ate fish and liked it tonight is so freaking cool. I won’t
lie--part of the reason I wanted to write this particular blog post tonight is
because I needed some venue to share this momentous occasion with everyone
without being overly obvious about it. So now you know about this truly
groundbreaking occasion and I already know that you are as impressed by The
Boss Lady’s new like (it’s not quite love yet) of fish. You can die happy now,
I’m sure.
See, it’s weird!!! Before I became a mom, I don’t think I
ever thought of sharing something so simple. But I am constantly overwhelmed
and compelled to share some of the simplest moments of my daughter’s life. I even
tried to come up with some other examples for the purposes of this post to show
you just how simple a thing can be and still impress me but I couldn't. And you
want to know why? Because those things are THAT SIMPLE. So simple I cannot even
remember them now. It’s that simplicity though that makes motherhood (and parenthood
in general) so incredible though.
I mean, I remember reading some blog post/article before The
Boss Lady made her debut and the author was talking about how ridiculous it is
that as a society we cheer for and champion every little thing our kids do. He used the example of a child going down a slide by himself and the mom cheering and said that it’s ridiculous to cheer
for a kid who came down the slide by himself because a monkey could do it. When
I read that post, I was thinking “Yeah, totally! That’s ridiculous! I will
never be one of those moms who thinks that all of that simple crap is worth
getting excited about!”
Then Olivia slid down a slide for the first time—BY HERSELF.
Justin Timberlake could not elicit the excitement from a crowd of teenage girls
(or 30 something year old women, truth be told) that The Boss Lady elicited
from me as she came down that slide. I jumped up and clapped and in my proudest
mommy voice I said “Oli, you did it BY YOURSELF!!!” and I nearly called Harvard
to let them know she’d be joining them in 2028.
Seriously, motherhood gives you this gift of finding the excitement
and the joy in the very simplest of things. Everyone knows about the big
milestones and why they’re exciting (crawling, first tooth, first steps, etc.)
but no one ever told me how exciting all of the stupidly simple things would
be. Never in my life would I have thought I’d be cheering for someone sliding
down a slide or stacking blocks or being able to put on their own shoes. All tasks
that a monkey could do quite frankly. But when my kid does those things, it’s
like art. It’s THE MOST INCREDIBLE thing I've ever seen.
Now I’ve got to go put The Boss Lady to bed. And who knows—after
tonight’s amazing dinner episode, maybe she’ll do something even more
incredible. Like turning off the lights—BY HERSELF! I mean, really, the
possibilities to be amazed by my child are endless, people. ENDLESS.
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